A Moveable Feast

Hey Everyone,  I think I actually have become Too Legit To Quit.  So check me out on www.shewhoeats.com

I’m keeping the name, I’m rocking it out, and I’m in an Empire State of Mind.

Come see me at my new digs and follow the adventures in Foodland.

She Who Eats Lives!

If anyone out there is still reading, hello!

I know this blog, along with so many others, has been gasping and wheezing the long death rattle of literary and food frivolity.  But there’s kind of a good reason.

You see, for a year now, this small town food enthusiast has been preparing for a move to New York City.  Just like I spent my paradoxical decade in Southern Appalachia searching for hints of cosmopolitan worldliness and cultural diversity, in the Big City I plan to seek out authentic community, quaintness, and nature trails.

But mostly, food.  Crazy food.  Woman vs. food.  Food that was created in a science lab, or grown on a rooftop.  My list is long, and the first couple of years will be spent in a mad dash of food tourism, dragging my Partner- in-Dine from borough to borough, from night market to food truck, indulging all gastronomical fantasies that were born in far away lands.  I can’t wait to find my favorite dim sum, my neighborhood West African takeout, and my personal go-to for a slice.  I plan to become the Louis and Clark of urban food exploration, and I’d like to take you with me.  Along with the advent of adventure, I predict my passion for blogging will once again rise to the surface.   Cheers to adventure, and food exploration.  This post has been updated; I’m keeping the name.

Together let us, like the Muppets who’ve gone before, take Manhattan.

Pho: Take Two

A couple of months ago, I wrote a review over at Ashvegas of Pho Fusion, a newish Vietnamese cafe located in the eclectically random Downtown Market.  Although I was thrilled to add Vietnamese pho to Asheville’s rainbow of fruit flavors, not everything about Pho Fusion was thrilling.  Take note:  things have changed, for the better.  The pho itself was once bland and barebones, during my last two visits I detected savory notes of onion, spice, and perhaps even mint?  In any case, the broth has deepened into a richer, more fulfilling, and hotter bowl of soup.

Also, they’ve augmented their menu with vermicelli noodle bowls!  I was hoping they’d get around to adding vermicelli bun salads to their menu in time for spring, and they are delicious.  Choose from tofu, beef, chicken or shrimp to top your bowl of rice noodles and julienned veggies.  Dash the spiced fish sauce on top and you’ve got an authentic, light, and colorful meal.  They’ve also added some walls to create a homier feel to the cold warehouse, and I noticed an addition of some East-Asian sodas and drinks to accompany your culinary experience.
On two recent occasions I ordered the daily special of a pork and rice dish with a pork quiche.  The pork quiche was exquisite, fluffy and a tad sweet.  I vote the quiche makes it onto the regular menu.  I also noticed an addition of meatballs as a pho option.  Pho fusion is getting it’s act together, way together, and if you were a disgruntled customer their first few weeks, here’s your invitation to give them another chance.  I was so glad I did.

101 Appetizers

aww, so cute and cuddly I could just stab it with a toothpick

I think we all know how I feel about the Minimalist (love him!) so I’m happy to present Mark Bittman’s newest seasonal resource you can no longer live without.  I’m using it tonight, and you should too.

101 Easy Appetizers in Under 20 Minutes

So far I’ve made the white bean dip with sage, which was delicious but I recommend adding lemon juice.  The quick olive tapenade rocked, as did the goat cheese plus fig jam.  Honestly, I’d love to eat like Cher in the movie Mermaids and have nothing but appetizers for dinner every night.  If it’s on a stick, bringeth to me. 

like a good cream puff, this film holds up well!

Okay, so now you know what I’ve been doing.  Cooking up cute wittle scrumptious tasty bites of joy.  Plus I made a weird, misshapen fat-laden pot roast, mistook a rutabaga for a turnip, and made many botched batches of fudge.  Speaking of which, what happened to my fudge mojo and how can I get it back?  Any ideas for how to create a fudge that’s not too grainy, not too greasy, and not too rubbery?  I want my fudge like Goldilocks- just right.

Oh Snap!

Well I got called out over at Ashvegas for not breaking the news about Pho Fusion’s opening.    I’m not trying to be a news source here, but I guess it is finally opening on November 20.  At this point I’m not holding my breath, however.   Not until I have tasted it for myself will I believe it.

Also, I guess now it’s pretty clear that the secret’s out.  I do not read the Asheville Citizen-Times.   Nor do I plan to start.

I’d like to know what you think about the new Greenlife/Whole Foods hybrid situation.  There was a time when Greenlife was my home away from home.  The cashiers always liked my outfits, the key lime pie was the best in town, and the clientele were my peeps.  But lately.  The snazzy new salad bar looks snazzy enough, but they’ve also raised the price by $1 per pound.  Last night, most of the wines “on special” were over $13, and I became confused about where everything is made.  Let’s say you’re a chicken pot pie.  If you are labeled “Whole Foods,” does that mean you were made at the Greenlife in Asheville?  Or were you shipped from someplace?  Confusion, mass confusion!

Also, Whole Foods is owned by a capitalist, libertarian, conservative climate-change refuter, so let’s just cut the ruse of down homey-liberal-progressive vibes and call a corporate takeover a spade.

At any rate, what are your thoughts, Asheville?  Is Greenlife better than ever?  Should we all get on board because now the employees have benefits and better pay which is better for our town?  Or do you long for the days when you could pick up some ground beef that had been raised down the road at a nearby farm, rather than “USA”.   Cause those days are over.

Best Food Blog Again!

Thanks so much if you voted for She Who Eats for Best Food Blog in Asheville! I was thrilled to find out I tied with Short Street Cakes for the honor.  As a reward for your undeserved loyalty, I will offer you a lifetime supply of. . .  More Posts!  I would like to say that I will post at least once per week, forever.

This week’s Food News:  The Vietnamese are coming!  The Vietnamese are coming!  I am sick with anticipation.  The Downtown Market is sick of my harrassing them about what date the Vietnamese fusion restaurant will open its doors.  It’s official (or is it?):  Pho Fusion will open on October 1st.   Although I wish it didn’t include the word “fusion,” I am nonetheless thrilled we will finally be able to get some potentially authentic pho around here.

Now, which one of you lovely readers will open a Korean restaurant?  Let’s get this Asiaphile fed right, y’all.

Back and Rarin’ to Rant

What can I say?

Nothing gets the creative fires burning quite like a despicable, horrible, terrible, no good very bad restaurant experience.  So I’m back, for one reason and one reason only.

It’s time for a good ole’ therapeutic rant.

I refer to therapy because I might go looking for one to recover from the most horrible night out to dinner in years.  One caveat to this is that the company could not have been more wonderful.

Hear ye, hear ye.  I am instituting a house-wide boycott of Salsa’s.  I take back every complimentary, kind, overexcited word I ever wrote about Salsa’s.  I went to Salsa’s on Friday, for the first time in over a year, and I will NEVER go back.  Not as long as I’m paying, anyway.

Caipirinhas and mojitos looked pretty, but no one in our party detected rum within the sugary cocktails.  With a hefty charge of $7 for the former and $8 for the latter, this sober diner remained nonplussed.

We order a salsa trio, at $9 for 3 options, to share between four people.  The trio arrived, a pineapple, a guacamole, and a roasted tomato and almond sauce.   Back in happier times, Salsa’s used to offer a hefty number of chips and separate their salsas with ramekins.  Last Friday, the salsas came smushed together in a nebulous mass, with a meager ring of oversized, not-for-dipping chips.  The salsas all tasted just fine, but were quickly pushed towards one another until rendered indefinable.

I have sung the praises and glories of Salsa’s inventive menu for years.  How many tourists have I pointed toward their overly-hyped direction?  There was a time when one could open a giant empanada and find a treasure box of sweet pumpkin, velvety goat cheese, rainbow chard, wild boar, pungent mushroom, all delicately spiced with an inspired, fruity salsa.   The tastes seemed worlds apart, but came together in the mouth like a boys choir of chaotic perfection.   That was then.

On this fateful night, I ordered the molcajete.  What came to the table was a gargantuan stone bowl of thin soup.  Tossed into the soup were some random squash, a carrot slice or two, and some other stock soup vegetables.  Plus, slices of taut, underspiced steak.  I was unable to find any of the mole sauce that the menu had advertised.  Their side of rice proved equally as bland, and as I chewed painfully, I recalled a past meals, when the rice burst forth flavors of the carribean, and beans, redolent of cumin and tradition, came alongside a few pert plaintain slices.

All this might, maybe, perhaps have been forgiven, but to top it all off, our table service lacked a sense of order.  During the 55 minute wait which we were told would be 20-25, we tried to order drinks.  My partner-in-dine was repeatedly ignored, then told our drink order had been lost 3 times.  By the time we were seated, we were thirsty, hungry, hot, and ready for some apologies.  This is no way to start a meal.  Not to mention (but let’s mention it) standing water in the bathroom begs an inquiry into their most recent health inspection.

I know I won’t win any popularity points with this rant, but after a stomachache and $70 I won’t ever get back, it had to be said.  Salsa’s ain’t what it used to be, and though business was obviously booming all weekend, this is one customer who won’t be back.

Joys of Spring (Gastronomically Speaking)

1. Prosecco – it’s refreshing, not too bubbly, and the third ingredient is joy.  Some of my faves are on the shelves at Greenlife right this minute.

2. Two Spoons is open (although they are no longer using Ultimate ice cream and their new brand leaves a LOT to be desired.  Discuss.)  As an alternative, may I recommend the chocolate malt from the lunch counter at Woolworth Walk?  It is divinely thick and malty.

3.  The Michelada My recipe:  the juice of one lime, a couple of dashes of Worchesteshire sauce, a little horseradish, a dash or two of tobasco, salted rim, 3 ice cubes, and a bottle of Pacifico.  Mix, drink, go to heaven.  If you don’t want to make your own, Curras Dom mixes the best in town.

4.  Fresh, local asparagus.  Look for it at the first few farmers’ markets, or do what I do and invite yourself over to your gardening friends’ houses for dinner.

5. Sushi. I’m rarely interested in eating sushi during the winter, but once the weather warms, I can think of nothing but fish and rice, fish and rice.  Try Sora in Brevard for the freshest, most exciting sushi in WNC.

6.  Grilling out. So far we’ve made tuna steaks, steak-and-veggie shish ka bobs, roasted potatoes and onions, and turkey burgers.  What have you thrown on the grill this year?

7.  Caipirinha at Cocina Latina (Tomato). Honestly, it could have been a tad stronger, but I know Brazil’s favorite mix of refreshing lime, rum, and sugar will be hitting the right spot all summer long.

8.  Ramps. I love to sample all the inventive creations from local chefs who annually find new ways to work this fresh, garlicky, severely local green into their menus.   Ramps can often be found on the menus at The Market Place, Sunny Point Cafe, Cucina 24, Early Girl, and others.

9.  Local lamb. It’s starting to pop up on Asheville’s seasonal menus and specials.  Last week I had a Hickory Nut Gap lamb gyro from Sunny Point that tasted like springtime.

10.  Burgers, Dogs, Cheese Fries and Milk Shakes. You really want to know where I’ve been eating this month?  Really?   French Fryz (BEST strawberry milkshake in town), Five Guys Burgers and Fries (my pick for best burger),  Cats and Dawgs (best hot dogs around), and let’s throw in a Philly Cheese Steak for good measure from Philly Hoagie House and Ice Cream Parlor in Woodfin.  I’m a Chicago girl at heart, and that means when the sun comes out and the temperature rises, it’s time for some serious junk food.

What culinary expressions of Spring are you enjoying?  I’d love to know!

Good News for Asheville

Like we need any more reasons to wish for sunshine instead of snow, here’s yet another:  The Euromarket Cafe is set to open, but not until the absolute last snowflake has landed on these cold mountains.

If you already make it a regular practice to head over to the Euromarket for Tarragon soda, red caviar, and Polish chocolate bars, then you are aware of this thrilling new epicurean venture on the horizon.  Asheville’s premier Eastern European market is about to start serving food, at an incredibly low price too!

For years now, I have put Eastern European on the top of the list of “foods we can’t get here,” and I am totally psyched those dark days are coming to an end.  Slowly but surely, WNC is becoming the culinary tour d’ force I have long awaited.

Located on the corner of Patton Ave and Haywood Rd in West Asheville, the Euromarket Cafe plans on serving lunch and dinner, offering  such hearty menu items as Russian Borscht, Armenian eggplant stew, and Ukhafish soup.  They will offer all manner of blintzes stuffed with meat, chicken, cabbage, or sweet cheese, plus large meat dumplings called gutabs, caviar sandwiches, marinated platters, vegetarian plates, and Bosnian coffee.

Each of these dishes range in price from 5-$9!  Not to mention, of course, they will serve a variety of Eastern European beers and wines.  Grab any beer from the shelves and crack it open for $4.50.

Tonight, when you kneel for your daily prayer/affirmation/meditation for an end to the dreary white stuff, be sure to add a hail mary/light a candle/chant/sun salute for the Euromarket Cafe.  I’m ready to finally hear the famous Russian words    Priiatnogo appetita!*

*Bon Appetit in Russian.  Nobody in Russia really ever says that.

Thirsty Monk Does Food Happy Hour!

Ever since I returned from a trip to Portland, Oregon, I have lamented Asheville’s lack of a food happy hour. In Portland, many of the high end restaurants offer small samplings of their menu for $3-$6, from 4-6pm weeknights.  The restaurants make a ton of money off of cocktail and wine sales, while the 20-somethings or others with lower income get to taste the gourmet food for a fun, snackable price.  When in Portland, I fully embraced this phenomenon, and bellied up to the Happy Hour tables every evening I could. 

Back in Asheville, I just know this would do wonders for upscale restaurants who may be struggling, because diners are spending more conservatively these days.  Finally, I’m not the only one who agrees.  The Thirsty Monk is now offering a food happy hour, week nights, from 4pm-6pm!  Oh Joy!   Last week I tried a soft-baked pretzel with mustard and a lamb slider, both $3 each!  I’m going back to try their $6 poutine (pomme frites with melted blue cheese and stout gravy).    So let’s all support Thirsty Monk’s brilliant new venture, in the hopes that more restaurants will try to lend us poor gourmets a helping hand.

Oldie But Very Goodie: East Village Grille

I’ll admit it: I don’t want you to read this review.  I don’t want you to know the glory and wonder of this undiscovered treasure; I want to hoard it all like a landlocked pirate, and curse all ye who find the spot marked with an x.  There are not many restaurants in Asheville where I can hide without bumping into an awkward acquaintance, to enjoy the Winter Olympics in peace and solitude.  But I’ll sacrifice it all so the world will learn of this uncharted culinary gem in Oteen, of all places.

If you need a break from the posh, the hip, and the cosmopolitan tourist trap, the East Village Grille, on 1177 Tunnel Rd, is your relief.

The dimly lit dining room plus bar is decorated slightly better than your college dorm room, sports magazines are randomly strewn about the tables, and the menu appears too general and expansive to be truly great.  But that is exactly what it is.

East Village Grille’s bar offers a decent selection of beers on tap, including Highland’s rich Black Mocha Stout and Blue Moon, a personal favorite.

On my first visit I ordered ten wings, along with their homemade tangy ranch dip.  What I really love about this place is that it’s not trying to be a wing-crazed smorgasbord, its orgy of wings tasting like they were given a sponge bath in a rainbow of fruit flavors.  I don’t need thirty flavors of wings.  Just a few really great sauce options are all I require.  East Village Grille’s Tiger wings are beastly creatures, big enough to satisfy a substantial appetite for dinner.  Moreover, the Tiger sauce is sure to inspire any wing lover to ravage their meal before dashing off to write sonnets, love songs and slam poetry in fervent ode.

Slowly creeping, well-balanced heat and a sweet citrus finish make these wings worthy of the Olympic Gold.  (Do the wing-frying semifinals follow the curling competition?)  Thick sauce can lead to soggy skin on a chicken wing, but in this case the snappy crisp holds up perfectly, giving way to a substantial amount of juicy meat within.

Another contender for the pub food Gold is EVG’s onion rings.   Onions rings seem like a no-brainer, just something to throw on the plate next to a burger.  But often I’m working my way through bland breading to reach the flaccid, pale onion hidden deep within its starchy casing.  These onion rings crackle delightfully on the tongue, like savory pop rocks.  The thick juicy onion is front and center, complimented by a light, pleasantly greasy shell.  They pair beautifully with the spicy ranch.  Mom wondered why I kept writing home about these onion rings.

Like a good Greek diner, EVG offers a wide variety of sandwich options.  By the way they also feature steak dishes, ribs, Mediterranean entrees, pork chops, and on Wednesdays, pizza.  If a person can’t find something they want to eat here, they must be, well, vegan.

For someone who likes the wings but would rather eat them on a bun, I highly recommend the Tiger Chicken Sandwich.  Their Cheeseburger Club is an interesting, old fashioned three decker behemoth.  EVG’s “world famous” Grouper Reuben was the resounding answer to the riddle, “what do you get when you cross a Filet-o-Fish with a Big Mac?”  I could feel my arteries straining in protest, yet the grouper tasted fresh and mild, golden breading pleasantly shaking hands with a decadent mess of Russian dressing and coleslaw.  The prices are reasonable, and with Filo, a Greek bakery right next door for dessert, the East Village Grille is definitely worth the drive.  But let’s keep this between us.  Just don’t tell the tourists.

Wake Up to Waking Life

I finally visited the fairly new espresso house, Waking Life, on 976 Haywood Rd in West Asheville.  Joining me were two houseguests, both of whom consider themselves espresso junkies and experts in the craft.  Hip artists living in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, my friends can get some of the best, most compulsively perfect espresso in America on their morning walk to work.

These New Yorkers were humbled before the ultra-specific, handcrafted espresso, presented in precious robin’s egg blue cups.  Sunlight streamed in to the cozy little shop.  We sipped our drinks and watched in awe as customers, all sitting alone in front of laptops, meandered in and out of conversation, debate, laughter, and then back to the solitaire game or whatever.   They didn’t arrive together, but the atmosphere there was so comfortable, they spontaneously treated each other like old pals, working side by side.  This phenomenon felt completely foreign to my New York visitors, who declared their Americano a perfect storm of balance, richness, and adrenaline.

In this Starbucks age, a local coffee shop must deliver high quality coffee or have an unbeatable location to stay competitive.   Waking Life’s owner has invested most of his money and energy into the  (hand-cranked) espresso machine, the fine,  locally roasted coffee, and a small assortment of rustic loose teas.  Get the espresso right, and you’ve got an instant following.   Waking Life has earned their place in the coffee pantheon of Asheville, and is sure to attract a dedicated clientele.

When it comes to coffee, I’m kind of like the girls from Sex in the City.  I often go for the Cosmopolitan of caffeine, the Mocha.  I detected none of the requisite thick, high-fructose corn and chocolate syrup in my mocha.  Instead, the coffee leaped ahead of a lingering chocolate aftertaste, balanced so exceptionally well,  I hadn’t even ruined my appetite for dinner.   Rather than simply discerning the tongue parching experience of “sweet” coffee, I was able to separate the flavors enough to experience them both, bitter acid and sweet decadence, before they met in an erotic tango of caffeinated bliss.

If espresso’s not your thing, you can find (arguably) the best cup of coffee in town.  Each individual cup is hand brewed, just for you.  That’s dedication.

I love when a fanatic like Jared Rutledge opens a coffee shop, simply because he loves his town enough to do the hard work to elevate the quality of its beloved coffee.  Sipping our steaming drinks on a frigid winter day, we felt loved too.

If you have a morning, afternoon or evening to kill, I suggest you spend it at Waking Life, open 7am-9pm daily.